And in all things....

It has been such a crazy year. Not just in my life, either, but in the lives of my friends and family. As I reflect on everything, I'm glad I and everyone else made it through okay.

This past week, I was reflecting on worship, especially in terms of what that means in everyday life. Worshipping God in all your actions sounds like a straightforward thing at first, but I guess I didn't really stop to think about what it really meant. I think after last night, I have a much better understanding of what it means to have hope, and to have a deeper inner joy that comes from that hope. And in some way, last night was an answer to prayer...I did ask to learn how to worship Him more deeply. Sigh. But alac and alas, we always learn more in situations of pain and suffering than we do in okay times.

So to summarize...last night was harrowing, I cried, I was confused, dazed, shocked...I was helpless, and all I could do was trust God with everything, which I wasn't doing very well. I asked, "Why?" a lot, and I know there are so many answers...which don't really matter at the moment. I just need to stop worrying about things I can't control.

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8